ROSEANNE ROSEANNADANNA here. We got a letter from Mr. Feder in New Jersey – Dear Roseanne Roseannadanna. I am lonely in New Jersey, I think I should get a rescue dog. Do you know where I can find the perfect companion? WELL, As a matter of fact, Mr. Feder – I, Roseanne Roseannadanna, am a 7-year-old blue beauty looking for a perfect home! I was just told I was cleared for the available list, and I thought I was gonna die! I mean, how long have I been waiting here??

Let me tell you – I recently came from a home with loving parents, who took care of me so well. They had rescued me from a breeder, where I had lived just to produce little versions of me. Things at the new place were good at first, but then the other dogs – they took advantage of my good nature and thought it was fun to pick on me. What was that about? I thought I was gonna die! My parents knew I needed a better situation, so they called FBRN to the rescue (no, the pun isn’t lost on Roseanne Roseannadanna). Lately, I’ve been living the high life with a woman they call my foster mom. And let me tell you, I know what I am talking about. This place is amazing. My foster mom is a classy lady who pulled out all the stops for me. She got me shots to stop my itchy skin, pain medications for my ailing back, freshly-cooked meals so I don’t break out and even gives me a spa day with special baths. I mean, a girl has basic needs, you know what I’m saying?

Now, I, Roseanne Roseannadanna, knows what I am talking about when I tell you what I need in a home. Roseanne Roseannadanna can’t have any more dogs to jump on her and boss her around. No way. And Roseanne Roseannadanna needs someone home with her all the time. Go ahead, quit your job. Get one of those fancy ones where you can work from your bedroom and I can help you from your lap. I mean, why would you want to leave me here? You wanna make me sick? I can tell you one thing – I am an angel when you are with me, but if you walk out, I may loudly protest and leave a present on the floor to express my disappointment in your actions. Also, Roseanne Roseannadanna needs to continue my special diet, my special medicines and my special baths. And let me tell you, my human will need to pick me up for furniture and stairs – like I said, my back isn’t so good. In return, Roseanne Roseannadanna will swear to never leave your side and keep your lap warm all the rest of your days.

I’m going to quickly turn it over to my foster mom (a saintly woman) to describe me in her own words: ‘Roseanne Roseannadanna immediately greeted me by jumping into my arms and on my chest, something I haven’t seen her do with anyone since. After a long car ride where she quietly sat in her car seat she made herself right at home. And since then, every room that she enters into, everyone just falls in love with her. You’d never guess this pretty, quiet, calm blue diva is a barker and a jumper until you leave her home alone!’

Look, Roseanne Roseannadanna is telling it to you straight. I ain’t perfect – I have a few things I need to work on like everybody else. I mean, what are you gonna do? It’s always somethin’. But, Roseanne Roseannadanna has a heart bigger than a humpback whale and I am ready to share it. Roseanne Roseannadanna is ready for her knight in shining armor to come sweep me up and ride off into the sunset. I’ll be singin’ a Hallelu the whole way! So, Mr. Feder, if you are ready for Roseanne Roseannadanna to bring the sun into your life, pick up your pen and fill out that application! (You don’t have to be Mr. Feder and you don’t have to live in New Jersey to apply – just work with it). Don’t keep me waiting here! And don’t forget to start planning your trip to Virginia – Roseanne Roseannadanna isn’t anyone’s cargo and must travel with her new family no matter what. Now that we have that settled, goodnight my little Roseanne Roseannadanna’s. That’s the news.

FBRN does not ship dogs as cargo, so adopters are expected to pick up their dogs from their foster family.

FBRN dogs are in foster care in people’s private homes. For the foster families’ safety, we do not disclose specific locations, and we don’t set up meet and greets prior to applications. For detailed information about the dogs in our care, please read the extensive bios on each dog.